Friday, July 3, 2009

About Face

I get annoyed/frustrated by my face because I feel it betrays me when I need it most.

Having slight autism has made it hard for me to use my face like normal human primates to express emotions. When I'm on the top of my game, feeling good, full of energy and spunk, I'm pretty good and my face is all glowy and adorably over-expressive and people like that.

But when I'm low on energy or just mulling over a problem in the back of my mind, my face can get "stuck" expressing an emotion that may have nothing to do with the conversation I'm having with someone and that gets a lot of people confused about how to take me. And it frustrates the crap out of me because I'm like: listen to what I'm saying! I can't say it clearer! And then they tell me my face looks like I'm feeling [insert inappropriate emotion here] and then I just feel totally incapable of functioning conversationally.

The worst part is that this happens with the people I'm most intimate with at delicate moments when all the sensitivity in the world that I can muster can't combat the stupid face I don't even know I have on.

I used to make my face a calm-looking mask that only emoted the strongest of emotional reactions, but once I stopped doing that comment after comment from friend, acquaintance & stranger alike reinforced to me how unhappily ill-suited I am to have chosen a communications job.

On the other hand, I probably choose it subconciously because I thought it would help me fix those problems. Too bad I decided that before I knew I had Asperger's and this isn't the kind of thing you can just fix, just negotiate around.

And that's my complaint about my face: It doesn't function properly! ARGH.

Related posts:
Asperger's and the Internet
Reaction Shots
Anxiety and my Genetic Inheritence

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Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Seen Around Midtown: Whimsical Neighborhood

As I said on Twitter: disappointed by the ink feature. I put too much heart into my blog to be happy being reduced to "shocking!" http://tinyurl.com/knfysn

If you walk away from Westport Road, behind Pryde's Old Westport, you'll find a complex of what appears to be a mixed commercial and residential area. Here all of the houses/businesses (in houses) are brightly colored and whimsical (though sadly hard to photograph). It delights the bejeezus out of me each time I walk past:



For more of my pictures and what-have-you, visit my DeviantArt page.

Previous "Seen Around Midtown" posts:
Graffiti
Norman School
Big Brothers, Big Sisters

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Monday, June 29, 2009

Adapt Or Die

Global Humanitarian Forum has released a "The Anatomy of a Silent Crisis," which examines the human impact of climate change. These are the bits that stuck out most to me:

Climate change is already seriously affecting hundreds of millions of people today and in the next twenty years those affected will likely more than double – making it the greatest emerging humanitarian challenge of our time. Those seriously affected are in need of immediate assistance either following a weather-related disaster, or because livelihoods have been severely compromised by climate change. The number of those severely affected by climate change is more than ten times greater than for instance those injured in traffic accidents each year, and more than the global annual number of new malaria cases. Within the next 20 years, one in ten of the world’s present population could be directly and seriously affected.
...
It is a grave global justice concern that those who suffer most from climate change have done the least to cause it. Developing countries bear over nine-tenths of the climate change burden: 98% of the seriously affected and 99% of all deaths from weather-related disasters, along with over 90% of the total economic losses. The 50 Least Developed Countries contribute less than 1% of global carbon emissions.
...
To avert the worst outcomes of climate change, adaptation efforts need to be scaled up by a factor of more than 100 in developing countries. The only way to reduce the present human impact is through adaptation. But funding for adaptation in developing countries is not even one percent of what is needed. The multilateral funds that have been pledged for climate change adaptation funding currently amount to under half a billion US dollars.
...
The most powerful consequences of climate change arise when a chain reaction magnifies the effects of rising temperatures. Think of a region suffering from water scarcity. That scarcity reduces the amount of arable land and thereby aggravates food security. The reduced crop production results in loss of income for farmers and may bring malnutrition. Health issues arise that could further diminish economic activity as family members become too weak to work. With time, worsening environmental conditions combined with financial instability may force populations to migrate. Migration can then become a catalyst for social unrest if increased population density in the place of refuge causes resource scarcity.
...
Climate change aggravates existing problems. Many people today are not resilient to current weather patterns and climate variability, which is to say that they are unable to protect their families, livelihoods and food supply from the negative impacts of seasonal rainfall leading to floods or water scarcity during extended droughts. Climate change will multiply these risks.
...
Tulsi Khara, India has lived all her 70 years in the world’s largest delta, where the Brahmaputra and Ganges rivers meet and flow into the Bay of Bengal. “We are not educated people, but I can sense something grave is happening around us. I couldn’t believe my eyes – the land that I had tilled for years, that fed me and my family for generations, has vanished. We have lost our livelihood. All our belongings and cattle were swept away by cyclones. We have moved to Sagar Island and are trying to rebuild our lives from scratch. It wasn’t like this when I was young. Storms have become more intense than ever. Displacement and death are everywhere here. The land is shrinking and salty water gets into our fields, making them useless. We feel very insecure now.”
...
The main gradual changes are rising earth surface temperatures, rising sea levels, desertification, changes in local rainfall and river run-off patterns with increased precipitation in high latitudes and decreased precipitation in sub-tropical latitudes, salinisation of river deltas, accelerated species extinction rates, loss of biodiversity and a weakening of ecosystems. The impact of this gradual change is considerable. It reduces access to fresh and safe drinking water, negatively affects health and poses a real threat to food security in many countries in Africa, Asia and Latin America. In some areas where employment and crop choices are limited, decreasing crop yields have led to famines. Desertification and other forms of land degradation have led to migration. Furthermore, the rise in sea levels has already spurred the first permanent displacement of small island inhabitants in the Pacific.
...
The number of deaths from weather-related disasters and gradual environmental degradation due to climate change is expected to jump to about 500,000 people per year. (Source)
Humans are smart enough to figure all this out, but will we be smart enough to save ourselves?

I certainly hope so. It's the future outcome I'm working my ass off for.

I'd like to leave you with this video, which is a first-hand account of Alaskan teens on how climate change is threatening their village (via Twilight Earth):


Related posts:
Cultures Threatened as Climate Changes
Climate Change Art Destroys All Humans
The Problem With the Green Movement

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Friday, June 26, 2009

Life on the road as a Traveling Exhibitions Registrar [Guest Post]

Today's guest post is also about traveling and is by my fabulous friend from grad school, Gena, who got me my favorite internship ever when she was working at Bellevue Arts Museum. I've written about her artwork before and now she's here to tell us about her totally kick ass job.

Growing up, I was always a painfully shy child. I would hide behind my mother's leg when company came to visit, and I spent hours and hours wrapped up in my own imagination. I would sit and play with my dolls and create vivid story lines for them, and when I wasn't doing that, I was drawing. I spent a lot of time playing with my younger brother, too, but, looking back, so much of my life was spent living inside myself. I was very introverted and while I did have several very close and meaningful friendships, my life was always generally by the book, colored inside the lines.

I knew that I loved objects that had stories behind them, and I loved studying and reading all about art and past cultures. That's what led me to pursue a degree in art history as an undergrad. Museums were bastions of exploration and culture and intrigue for me, and I spent a lot of time wandering around the big ones in NYC as a kid. I never imagined I'd actually end up working in one as an adult, but it's amazing where life takes you, and working in a museum was somehow a really natural fit for me.

Nowadays, I am living life quite outside the lines, and I have to say, I'm loving it. At 32, I've definitely broken out of my old shell, and the life I live is one which many people have told me they would love to experience. The funny thing is that on the surface, it doesn't seem all that glamorous. You see, I am a museum professional. I have a Master's degree in Museum Studies, and have worked in various types of museums for the past ten years on and off. Those jobs helped me get to where I am today, working for one of the world's foremost institutions, the American Museum of Natural History in New York as a Traveling Exhibitions Registrar.

What is it that I do? That is the first question people ask me when I tell them my job title. Most people don't know what a museum registrar does to begin with, but throw in the "traveling" part, and they seem even more intrigued. When I meet new people at a party or other social occasion, and they ask me what I do, my life becomes an instant, awesome ice-breaker. Any lingering shyness I have instantly seems to fade into the background.

It's like I suddenly become this fascinating person, an object of envy and interest. The best part is that I'm not making any of it up: I get paid to travel around the world and install and de-install museum exhibits. I guess there aren't too many people on the planet who have the type of job that I do, so that makes me unique - and a hot commodity at parties. Don't get me wrong - it's not as though I am using my job as a way to gain new social status or make friends. I truly love what I do, and I work very hard at it. It took a lot for me to get to this point in my career and I am proud to answer the many questions people have for me, and I enjoy explaining what I do.

Gena in Sydney

A typical work trip for me would involve flying somewhere domestic or international. After my first two weeks on the job, for example, I was sent to Canberra, Australia, for two weeks to install an exhibition about Darwin at the national museum there. I was nervous because I had never travelled internationally, and I'd never been so far from home. It was about a 21 hour journey to get from my home in New York City to Canberra.

I usually work with another co-worker from my museum in NY, someone who sets up the object cases and the floor plan. This person and I work in tandem to make sure an exhibit goes up smoothly, safely and on time. My role is to protect and care for the actual objects - whether they be stuffed pigeons, model ships, monkey skeletons, beetles, etc. I examine the objects and write condition reports noting any damage or changes, and then I actually place the objects in their cases. So this is what I did for the two weeks I was in Australia.
Gena with an object from the Darwin exhibit

We generally work the typical daily schedule of the venue we go to. In most cases, we end up doing an 8:30-5 Monday-Friday schedule. In Australia (and also in London), the crew we worked with took a 30-minute tea break every morning at 10:30. I became fond of these morning breaks, as we fiesty, neurotic New Yorkers rarely take any breaks at all. Working with a new group of people in a foreign country, or even domestically, is wonderful. You adapt to their routines, and if you are at a location for three weeks, as I was recently in Anchorage, Alaska, you get to really know your new co-workers. And three weeks is enough time to get used to a new city, spending the off hours exploring and going on adventures.
Toasting to a job well done in London after the de-install of Darwin
with part of the crew she worked with there

I suppose I am glad to be able to say that I am truly proud of what I do. I don't live the glamorous jet-setting lifestyle of a corporate executive, and I don't get paid very much. But when I am on the road, all of my basic expenses are paid for - we get a daily stipend that covers food and travel expenses, and the musuem pays for our flights and hotel rooms.

There are times when life on the road isn't quite as exciting or easy, and sometimes there are moments when living out of a suitcase gets really depressing.
A typical travel schedule for someone in my position is about 30% of our annual workload. So I'm on the road a lot. But these trips tend to take place at certain predictable times of the year. Spring and Autumn seem to be our busiest times.

Typically our installation schedules are no longer than two-three weeks at a time. I also have shows that only take me 2-3 days to install. But sometimes shows overlap, and you end up having to do two back to back. This happened to me recently when I traveled to London for two weeks to de-install Darwin, and then was flown directly to Anchorage, Alaska for another three weeks to install Gold.

Five weeks on the road is a long time. I had never been away from home for so long. I can truly say that the experience challenged me and changed me in profound ways, however, and broadened my world view quite significantly. As a single person, being able to pick up and go is what makes this job possible for me. If I had a partner or children, or even pets, I would probably not be doing this job. It just happens that I am at a point in my life where I am able to take on the challenge of a job that involves travel, and that's what makes life so exciting.

Not many people can say that they're working their dream job. I never thought it would happen to me, either, but somehow it did. I guess I am living the life right now and enjoying it all.

It's sometimes hard to balance the travel on the road with work back at the office. Coming back to my desk and my spreadsheets and my day to day activities can be a real downer after traipsing around a new city and seeing an exhibit go up from start to finish. The best part of my job is the feeling of satisfaction and instant gratification I get watching a show come together. When you're on the floor in the gallery placing the objects, work is being done and you can see instant results. Interestingly, I experience a feeling of sadness when I de-install a show - taking everything out of the cases and packing them back into their crates to move on to another venue can be somewhat depressing in a way. But it is a sense of completion too.

I'm not sure how long I will be able to live this kind of lifestyle, because I do hope to find a partner and have a family in the not too distant future. Traveling as much as I do probably wouldn't jive with that. But until that happens, I will continue to take life one show at a time. I feel blessed by the Universe to have been handed this opportunity; I am getting the most that I possibly can out of it, and I enjoy sharing my story with anyone who is interested.

Luckily for me, most people seem genuinely intrigued and curious about what I do, so there is never any shortage of people who want to know more. This aids my old deep-seated shyness, because if someone is brimming with excitement at hearing what you do for a living, it's kind of hard to clam up. My own enthusiasm for my occupation is hard to contain so I often get just as excited talking about it as the people who are listening to my story.

Related posts:
My Multi-Talented Friend and Her Automatic Drawing
Adventures in Collections Management
Traveling America in Absence of American Values [Guest Post]

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Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Traveling America in Absence of American Values [Guest Post]

I'm happy to bring you one of two guest posts this week, both about traveling! The first comes from my new friend Kris. Enjoy!

Hello, readers of May’s Machete! I am Kris the Educated Vagabond of The Yellow Brick Road Trip and a very big fan of May.



Kris the Educated Vagabond

Like May, I often find a multitude of adjectives to describe some portion of myself, but have yet to find that one meaningful word to encapsulate who I am or my world view. When people ask my religion or outlook on life, I offer a variety of answers such as Bokononist, Integrational Polytheist, or more commonly Cultural Relativist. As a woman traveling in the 21st century, I think cultural relativism is the closest description I have found to encapsulate my world view.

Franz Boas, the Father of American Anthropology, originally explained the idea: “...civilization is not something absolute, but ... is relative, and…our ideas and conceptions are true only so far as our civilization goes.” It means our philosophies or dogmas can only understood in the context of our culture. To take this a step further, what we do and what we believe can not be understood outside of the place, time, and society where these beliefs are held.



Franz Boas, the Father of American Anthropology

Though this idea was first introduced by Boas in 1887, I find it is especially relevant in the shrinking 21st century. As I have traveled this country, I constantly hear the assertion of “American Values.” I assume people mean liberty, democracy, baseball, and Mom’s apple pie. But truthfully, I have never seen “American Values” as a unified concept.

We could divide it by red states and blue state. We could dissect it further and then separate the red states by Republican and Democrat. Then we could divide the Republicans by Liberal, Moderate and Conservative. Still further, we could divide the Moderates by their religious affiliation and from there by their income tax bracket. Maybe we keep dividing and separating until we get down to a group of five people. Are these people representative of the entire state? Of the entire country? Are their “American Values” the true “American Values”?

Quite simply, no, because there are no true “American Values.” And even if we were to define them we still could not set them in absolutes because how they are understood would change in their conception according to their context. Five moderate Republicans in Kansas do not speak for five liberal Democrats in California. So if neither can be right, it follows that neither can be wrong.

That is how I travel. I don’t attempt to impose my beliefs on anyplace I am nor allow them to impose their beliefs on me. I look. I observe. I see. And most importantly, I seek to understand. I can’t tell you how essential cultural relativism – or at least a sense of tolerance and open-mindedness – is to the lifestyle of an educated vagabond.

Read more from Kris at The Yellow Brick Road Trip.

Related posts:
Weight, Honesty and Obesity in the USA
My Trip Out of Republican Wonderland [Guest Post]
USA Should Open Borders, Open Minds


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Monday, June 22, 2009

MC Frontalot's Nerdcore


So Keith, aka coderigger, took me and my baby with him to see Nerdcore Rising about MC Frontalot a while ago. I knew about nerdcore rap, but had limited exposure. I knew MC Chris because of Sealab 2021, and Optimus Ryme and MC Hawking because of ze boyfriend, and that was about it.

Turns out MC Frontalot is the one who coined the "nerdcore" term, which describes "a genre of hip hop music characterized by themes and subject matter considered to be of general interest to nerds, though it can appeal to others as well," according to Wikipedia.

After seeing the documentary about MC Frontalot's first tour (the afore mentioned Nerdcore Rising), I eventually remembered to visit Frontalot's website and download his music. Now he's one of Matt's favorite rappers so he keeps playing him over and over and now I've got MC Frontalot stuck in my head so hard that any old thing can make me start mentally rapping his songs.

So it's a good thing I really like him too or otherwise this would suck ass. My favorite songs include such numbers as:

It Is Pitch Dark


Which includes the lyrics:
You are likely to be eaten by a grue.
If this predicament seems particularly cruel,
consider whose fault it could be:
not a torch or a match in your inventory. (Source)

Charity Case


The sound on that is kind of crappy, but his dancing cracks me up. Click here for a good recording.

Selected lyrics:
It’s true:
Frontalot’s destitute.
I need you
to buy my CD so I could buy food.

I been a charity case to my fan base for years:
in tears at my show, “somebody buy me ride home.”
Now I’ve got something I can barter for services.
Don’t let the major labels get word of this.
I’m girderless, free falling towards riches;
going to sell so many CDs that I can afford britches,
and a shirt, and a hat to go with it.

Bizarro Genius Baby


Selected lyrics:
Bizarro genius baby: at first I was elated, but eventually I grew concerned.
Bizarro genius baby: you prove my genes are Grade A, but what of when tables turn?

She had to settle for the Fields Medal but didn’t settle well,
all the while cursing the indiscretions of Madame Nobel,
and so well tuckered out was she at this point that she napped,
arose with a whole symphony composed in Bb.
“See dad?” Yes dear, it’ll go with the other ones on the fridge,
in between the two Puccinis you translated & abridged,
just above ‘I love you dad’ in macaroni/glitter
and the 37 villanelles to mom (but I ain’t bitter).

Wallflowers


Selected lyrics:

Step One:
Wiggle, wobble, wriggle,
coddle your young,
intensify your ennui,
then before you get done,
put your left foot over to the left if you dare,
then pretend you got scared,
then point at your hair.

Step Two:
Elevate everything up,
increase any numbers that you’re in control of,
then Skip to The Lou,
then stand stock still,
then illustrate for everyone your ultimate skill.



I Heart Fags



Selected lyrics:
I love fags because I am a San Franciscan.
If you’re dissing on my homos
then this censure’s what you’re risking
(I’m insisting on containing my temper but listen up):
you shouldn’t ought to be intolerant about who queers like to fuck! Fags are great. They’ve got hundreds of uses.
You can see them on TV explaining what puce is.

..and last but not least, Goth Girls


Selected lyrics:
‘cause I can’t talk to goth girls. I just stare and stammer: my name is MC Frimmer Frammer. And damn her if she giggles. Damn her double if she laughs. Goth girls like it when you double-damn it twice fast.

Goth girls, goth girls: they’re the girls that go
to see the nerdcore rapper with the geeked out flow.
At the show you can see the black lace on parade.
I met a hundred dozen of ‘em but I ain’t got laid.

This last song teleports me straight back to college in Pennsylvania where all of the nerds I was friends with up there were overwhelmingly goth or goth-inclined. Including the one chick I lost my lezzie virginity to and a lesbian that she later had a sub/domme relationship with... and who even later ended up being the first lesbian I had sexual relations with. Good times...

And then I get all distracted thinking about how much fun it is to lick girls...

MMmm... vagina!

The picture from Madonna's book Sex

Which brings me back to MC Frontalot cuz he's all like: "Some day I’ll be both revered & passé, like Madonna."

Go check him out.


Related posts:
Flobots "Fight With Tools" Album Review
Even Vegetarians Like Bacon Shoe
Put Your Headphones On (Your Heart)

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Friday, June 19, 2009

Black Inventors and their Inventions

When I saw a book titled Black Inventors, I knew I had to check it out. Think about the inventors you can name and consider how many of them are white. The only inventor of color I could think of was George Washington Carver, so I knew my worldview of inventors had to be skewed. So, in order to help us all unskew our view of inventors as white guys, I present you with some of the book's most interesting black inventors, as well as all the inventors listed from Kansas and Missouri:

1769 - Jamaican Dugald Clark patented a method to use steam power for sugar milling.

1821 - Thomas Jennings of Richmond, Virginia patented the dry cleaning technique of dry scouring clothes.

1834 - Jo Anderson co-invented the McCormick reaping machine.

1841 - Norbert Rillieux patented the sugar refining process.

1864 - Kansan William Douglass patented a self-binding harvester band twister, carrier chain, and several machine gun improvements.

1882 - Lewis Latimer discovered the filament that extends the life of a light bulb.

1884 - Jan Matzeliger patented shoe making devices that made the US world leader in shoe production.

1884 - Grant T. and brother Lyates Woods patented electrical dynamos, including the "third rail" for trains.

1889 - Missourian Daniel Johnson (a Kansas City resident, by the way) patented a lawn mower attachment, grass receivers for lawn mowers and a rotary dining table.

1909 - David Unaipon, an Australian Aborigine, patented an improvement for sheep shears.

1913 - Missourian Walter Majors patented nine items including a hair dryer, coin-controlled taxicab controller, monitor-controlling devices for taxis, an oil stove, an anti-skid device, a mimeograph attachment, a machine for treating hair and scalp, and more!

1919 - South African Santie Sabalala (while living in Ohio) patented a car brake.

1921 - Trinidadian Hubert Julian patented an airplane safety appliance.

1922 - Kansan John Arthur Johnson patented two theft-preventing devices for vehicles and a monkey wrench.

1939 - Bertha Berman patented the tooth brush holder, fitted bed sheet construction and a table cover.

1941 - Dr. Percy Lavon Julian created medicine, paints, lecithin and fire extinguishing foams out of soybeans.

1942 - Frederick Jones patented refrigerated units for trains, ships, planes and buses, allowing for the transportation of fruits, vegetables, frozen goods and medical supplies worldwide.

1943 - Norbert Rillieux of New Orleans revolutionized the sugar industry by inventing devices that convert sugar cane, beat and corn into sugar crystals.

1965 - Betsy Ancker-Johnson won patents for signal generators using semiconductor material in magnetic and electric fields, a radiant energy optical detector amplifier signal generator, solid state storage, switching devices and more.

1977 - Lonnie Johnson of Alabama invented the Super Soaker toy, patenting over 150 related items over the next 30 years.

1977 - Missourian Neil Thomas patented 42 chemical compounds for use in chemical treatment, demulsifiers, corrosion inhibitors, drilling fluids and water treating chemicals.

1984 - Bettye Greene developed many chemical processes related to latex paint.

1986 - Dosho Shifferaw of Ethiopia invented the Blowflex.

1995 - Missiourian Dannette Connor-Ward patented methods for soybean transformation and regeneration, sugar beet regeneration and transformation and efficiency soybean transformation protocol.

1996 - Sylvia Adae-Amoakoh patented three photographic developing compositions.

2001 - Christine Nare patented a formula to make alcoholic beverages from cereals and fruits.

For more black inventors visit BlackInventor.com.

Related posts:
Perception and Reaction to Racism Not Equal
Continuum of Acceptance
Tony's Take on Racism in the Kansas City Area

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